Sunday, December 06, 2009

Gin + gin + gin + vermouth = hockey?

I had originally meant to come home, drunk as an Irishman, and rant. Rant like I haven't ranted since Mike Comrie and the Edmonton Oilers kissed and made up. After all, we're not yet a third into the season and we're already looking at a lottery pick. Try as you will but you can't deceive me with Red Wing own goals or pretty stories involving Shawn Horcoff demanding a chance to shoot.

The fun thing is, I drank gin with a man from BC tonight who is actually a childhood friend of Shawn himself. I rarely bring up hockey around him, for he is distinguished in his own right, but the truth is we both love the game and we're both fans of players who bring it on both sides of the ice. So it is that I know weird things like Horc scored 40 out of his team's 45 goals en route to a peewee championship way back in the day. Truly a "skilled" player at the time.


The real drunken rant that I think I should aim for is one, poorly punned enough, in reverence for the work that gets done by the real heavy lifters on this blog. I'll be the first to admit that if Vic, Rivers, and Sunny are the Gretz, Mess, and Coffey of this corner of the internet, I am more of an Adam Graves or Joe Murphy, and since the girlfriend is currently passed out, I might as well spend this time throwing out some praise.

As I said, I had the chance to drink with one of Horc's good friends tonight. But did he, the drunken Irishman that he was, know the truth about Shawn's excellent zoneshift numbers over the last few years? Of course not. Did he know why Zetterberg is more valuable than Lecavalier despite similar boxcars? Again, of course not. Did he know why the hot redhead with the glasses was, for some inexplicable reason, unfathomably sexy? Well, actually, maybe he did. I expect it was obvious.

The inescapable, non sexy redhead truth here is that I have had the good fortune over the last few years to look at hockey through an entirely new set of eyes. I have always been an empirical type (as early as age 12, I spent time counting the amount of days I could spend avoiding a girl before she threw sand in my hair and professed her love for me) and therefore have gravitated to sites like this one. Through the perspectives of Vic, Rivers, Lowetide, Mudcrutch, Dennis, Black Dog, and so many others, I have had the good fortune to look at hockey in a completely new, more understandable light. I think it's worth taking the time to raise a glass (especially since some of you were influential in my choice of glass tonight) . There is fantastic work being done every day by smart hockey people on the internet and I sincerely appreciate the chance to read and absorb it, no matter how rarely (through my own life schedule) I get the chance.

If I ever meet another one among you, I will certainly buy you a beer. Until then, if you are someone who puts genuine thought into the game of hockey and then wanders onto the internet to post about it, please know that I appreciate the time you take. There are many among us, and since I have had about 18 gin martinis in the last 6 hours, I feel it is my place to say Thank You.



Blogger Sunny Mehta said...

Pretty cool that I get to be Coffey - I used to play D back in the dizzay. Though, I think now I'd be a defensively-responsible center. I don't currently play adult rec hockey (there's no ice here), but if I did, I have no doubt I'd be influenced by what I've learned about the game in the last few years. (I can see myself instructing teammates to focus on their Corsi.)

What kind of gin were you drinking? Personally I like Sapphire/rocks/twist. Though, there's a place nearby that makes fresh cucumber martinis using Hendrix, and that's a nice little toe drag to mix it up.

I've been saying for a while now that y'all should come down to New Orleans sometime for a "convention" (i.e. we all get drunk and talk about Nik Lidstrom).

I gotta imagine you guys need a break from the weather up there at some point. It's supposed to be 75 degrees (i.e. - 24 Celsius) here next week.

(Holy fuck! I just looked up Edmonton on and it says the "Feels Like" is currently -19 F / -28 C. Wtf is wrong with you people? No wonder Vic has such keen wit - he's probably delusional from frostbite.)

12/06/2009 10:00 am  
Blogger Showerhead said...

Haha thanks for that - I got a good visual of someone storming around the dressing room, kicking over garbage buckets, cursing furiously about corsi rates while a bunch of confused 18 year olds sit, jaws dropped, beers open but frozen in hand.

As for the gin, it was indeed Sapphire, which I confirmed expertly by googling a picture of its bottle :) The first martini I ordered came to me with vodka in it but I sneered pretentiously enough* that the barkeep offered to remake it to my pleasure. I refused, fired it back, and so an excellent night began.

Also, I didn't know you were down in New Orleans - how did you come by your hockey fandom?

*by sneered pretentiously, I actually mean politely stammered something about understanding that asking one bartender to cover the entire party was a little much and that I would forgive him if he was generous with the gin to follow. A good man, that one.

12/07/2009 11:59 am  
Blogger Sunny Mehta said...

Ha, cool. My hockey fandom is a combination of growing up in New Jersey and enjoying doing things none of my friends/classmates liked (there weren't many/any other hockey fans in my elementary school in Jersey in the late '80s.) :)

12/07/2009 12:38 pm  
Blogger Hawerchuk said...

heh...Analysis doesn't go over very well in beer leagues. We played a team with a very fast first line...And our third line was going to go up against them. I said "We don't want this matchup." The third-line center said "Fuck you" and hopped over the boards.

12/08/2009 12:17 am  
Blogger Black Dog said...

So you did go with the martinis, good man.

As for redheads ... yowza.

12/09/2009 11:26 am  
Blogger Showerhead said...

Sunny: Wow, the idea of liking hockey to be different kind of blows my mind. I've lived in Calgary, Edmonton, Toronto, and Winnipeg (as well as small town Manitoba) though so it's easy to see why I take it for granted.

Hawerchuk: how did that game go for you? :)

Black Dog: Drank them until I became addicted to the olives. I think I've mentioned it before but one of my favourite gin moments involves a hot blonde who I'd made fun of for liking the Flames all night pulled her lips away from mine with an "I'm going to say something very important now" look on her face. She furrows her brow, looks me deep in the eyes, and then hits me with: "You taste like... like CHRISTMAS TREES!"

I almost fell off the bed.

12/09/2009 11:07 pm  
Blogger Black Dog said...

ha, great one

12/10/2009 8:23 am  
Blogger 放假 said...

cool blog,期待更新..................................................

12/18/2009 12:08 am  

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